Looking back and ahead.

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Bear with me on this one folks, a little ranting, raving, but worth it in the end 🙂

So I constantly see other blogs, cartoons,etc telling us how we are parenting wrong. How the world we knew has gone to hell in a hand basket because we spoil our kids.
Quite frankly I’m sick of reading them.
Just because something was acceptable and good years ago does not make it acceptable today.
Let’s look back for a minute…. Years ago there were no seat belts, pregnant mothers were told to drink beer while pregnant, smoking was the norm in hospitals, fathers went to work then out for a drink, not spending much time with their kids, kids left school in grade 8, bullying was only considered a problem if a child was beat.
Do you see where I’m going?
Do I think some things were better then? Of course I do. But I’m also well aware that as with anything, the more you learn, things change. Life evolves.

For starters I remember my grandparents telling heart breaking stories of torture at the hands of their peers, was anything done? Nope, in fact had an older boy not happened across my grandmother tied to a post with the grass burning at her feet, who knows what the outcome would have been. (I’m only using this example because its one I can really speak on and is close to my heart:-)  )
So yes the definition of bullying has changed, as it damn well should. It is a proven fact that verbal, mental, emotional scars from bullying are worse than the physical.
It is often assumed bullies are bullied at home, so take it out on others,another myth, more often than not they have to much self confidence, self righteous, and entitlement issues. That can come from yes you guessed it the society we live in today, and yes sometimes even the way we parent. Because yes if you give them an inch,they’ll take an inch.
Your probably wondering where this is even coming from? I’ve read few things recently that we as parents of victims make a big old pity party out of it. Are you kidding me?! Do you think for one second I wanted that for my child? Do you think I just loved having him hospitalized due to it? Ya that was awesome.  My one piece of advice is if you are going to write/post about such things, possibly wait until you’ve had to deal with the situation, or at least until you have children or your children are out of diapers. Not saying you don’t get an opinion on it, but reserve that until your toddler is actually in school.
The word bully is in fact over used, thrown around far to easily, lessing the meaning for those affected. It’s a bit of a double edged sword. But I can tell you for those of us who have battled that battle, it is real,its horrible, its terrifying and there’s no pity party about it!

Once again I say, if you are a parent, and doing the best you can, trying hard to raise a hard working, caring,and kind little human,that’s what matters.  I am so so very tired of the parent judging, that’s what I’m tired of, not that maybe Suzy coddles her child to much, or Jenny is to hard on her child. Guess what I’m not those kids parent, so I don’t know what works, or doesn’t. As long as you are a present parent, your not abusing your child, you won’t get judgment on your parenting from me. Cause god knows I wish people wouldn’t judge me. Don’t like the way “society” is making our kids? Society isn’t their parent, we are so it is up to us, in so many areas (the above was just one example) to create the children we want for the world we want. Weather it be fresh water, clear blue skies, acceptance, lessen poverty, abolish homelessness, keeping our farms alive, keeping our cultures viable, that is up to us to instill in our children.
Good jobs parents, good job for being the shoulder for your childs tears, the ears that hear their laughter, the eyes that see them grow,the hands that nourish them, the feet that get them to where they need to go. You are hard working,loving, kind and compassionate, you ARE good enough. You are unique, you are individual, you are the perfect parent for your children. You have the incredible gift of being your kids parent.
Now give your kids a hug 🙂

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