What I know for sure!

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Here’s what I know for sure. I know for sure my child has bipolar. I know for sure I love him just as he is.
I am a very open minded person, I don’t judge when others choose as treatment, I don’t question when someone has been given a certain diagnosis. Maybe I’m naive, but I don’t think so.
You see I also know that I’m fed up, sick and tired and done with others questioning or doubting the validity of my sons diagnosis.
It’s weighed on me for some time, opening up this can of worms, but open I must.
You see there’s people who have actually argued with me, got angry at me because they think he has something else (autism is number one of this argument).
Trust me when I say I know his illness for sure.
We didn’t grab this diagnosis out of a flipping top hat. In fact we work with a doctor that will not diagnosis a young child with bipolar, because their brains and development change so quickly, in reality my son is one of very few he’s felt that strongly to diagnose at the beginning of adolescence.
But see this doctor isn’t the only person we’ve dealt with in the last ten years.  Dude has been assessed and tested by pediatrician, OT, pt, three psychologists, sees a neurologist yearly, with mris, eegs and scans,  a geneticist and everyone in between.  No we’re not new to this.
Through testing, on going for years, years of OT, pt, and therapy, meds, changes, and then some more testing a few pediatrics physc stays, every single professional in our realm has produced the same conclusion. Rapid cycling bipolar, severe anxiety and ocd and ptsd from bullying.

You know what though? I don’t need them to tell me.  We live it. 
When meds need an increase it reaffirms to me we are doing the right thing, because there’s nothing scarier or sadder than not being level. Yes chemicals, shocker!
We’ve had him off all meds at one time, only one of very few times I’ve seen my husband teary as his little boy sobbed, screamed, tried ripping the sink off the wall, and finally crumbled in a ball. The knives were locked up, the razors with them,  nothing in his room that could harm him. That would be our life without the therapies and medication.
But no he’s not bipolar… (enter sarcasm).
We’ve held our son after trying to take his life, we’ve screeched to a hault on the highway as he tries to jump out,  we’ve soothed and calmed when there’s no bringing him down.
But no he’s got something else, not bipolar… Maybe if we just cut something out of his diet he’d be fine…. Oh FYI done that, and guess what? Not a bit of difference, again shocker!

This seems to be one of the biggest hurdles with any invisible illness, people assume that they know better or doubt it.  I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a physically ill person questioned about their illness, I’ve never witnessed someone saying “you know I don’t think you’re actually paralysed, I think you just have an allergy”  or “ahhhh I’d suggest taking this,  I don’t think you’re fighting cancer, I just think you’re not praying enough”.  Sounds pretty ridiculous right? Yet those faced with invisible illnesses hear it all and then some regularly.  And as a mother of a child whose been diagnosed I’ve heard it waaayyy to often, and I am done. I am pissed off and sick of it.
Do people actually think I wouldn’t do anything to have my son happy and healthy, do they actually think I wouldn’t choose something more straightforward if possible? Do they actually think for a second that maybe, just maybe we wouldn’t give anything for our children? We do,  daily every second of every day, and that’s why we are where we are.  Because the meds work, the therapy work. We’ve seen the improvement, we’ve seen the proof because no we’re not new to this!
Don’t ever doubt my love, support and loyalty to my children. Ever. And for God’s sake don’t question me, I have about three binders of reports to prove you wrong.
Yes I know for sure my son has bipolar, and I know for sure I love him just as he is!

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4 Responses to “What I know for sure!”

  1. threekidsandi Says:

    My son is too little to diagnose with much besides what he is already diagnosed with, but the medication is a godsend. I am tired of people raising an eyebrow at me because he is on meds. My five year old deserves a good day, just like any other kid. Withholding meds from him would be bad parenting in his case. No one knows what it is like to have a child who is disturbed, and no one knows the joy you experience when you realize he has had two good days in a row, that the meds might be working.
    I stick with my professionals, too. Forget everybody else’s opinion. You know exactly what you are doing. I am happy your son has you.

    • bestkids Says:

      You are so right! I think if people saw our kiddos without meds they’d question our parenting for that! My son had a handful of diagnosis when he was younger, because they felt he was to young to give him the concrete bipolar diagnosis, when he hit twelve it came full force and with his history they felt confident enough to do so. I’ve heard of very young kids diagnosed, and am unsure if I agree with it for a few reasons, though I know there are the few that it’s very obvious! I know with my son the tendency was always there it was a just wait and see how his brain changed and developed ☺ once the diagnosis was made a few of his others fell into it. It’s never an easy road, the juggling etc is painful to watch as a parent. Our children DO deserve the best and like you said good days just as others!

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